


Snickers

by MomoGeraldine



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman and Robin (Comics), Nightwing (Comics), Red Robin (Comics)
Genre: Batfamily (DCU), Bruce Wayne is Batman, Bruce Wayne is Not Okay, Bruce Wayne is So Done, Caring Batfamily (DCU), Dick Grayson & Bruce Wayne Bonding, Dick Grayson is Nightwing, Dick Grayson is Not Okay, Dick Grayson is So Done, Gen, Protective Damian Wayne, Protective Tim Drake, They're just so done, also i kind write kinda ansty stuff, it just had to be done, so i wanted to do kinda fluff?, they deserve better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-12 16:01:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29138232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MomoGeraldine/pseuds/MomoGeraldine
Summary: Snickers is good, delivers what it promised, mostly. It takes a good bite and enough chewing to get it down. He should probably drink water but he doesn’t care.Dick can and will be self-indulgent.
Relationships: Bruce Wayne & Damian Wayne, Dick Grayson & Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson & Damian Wayne, Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne, Stephanie Brown & Cassandra Cain & Tim Drake & Duke Thomas, Stephanie Brown & Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Duke Thomas & Jason Todd & Damian Wayne, Talia al Ghul/Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake & Damian Wayne, Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne & Damian Wayne
Comments: 3
Kudos: 20





	Snickers

‘Fuck you, Bruce!’

That’s the ever-circling thought in Dick’s mind as he eats Snickers.

Snickers is good, delivers what it promised, mostly. It takes a good bite and enough chewing to get it down. He should probably drink water but he doesn’t care.

Dick can and will be self-indulgent.

As Dick intently glares at Bruce, who’s sitting across him, also chewing madly Snickers. Staring back just as intently. 

One down, a few more to go.

As Dick eats, he hears a door opening, from the footsteps, it’s Tim.

“How long?”

He asks, between nonchalant and bewilderment.

“Since this morning, around 4.”

Dami answers just as nonchalantly.

“Fuck you, Bruce!”

Dick decides it’s now time to scream that. Still glaring, burning holes at Bruce.

How dare he hurt Dami, how dare he hurt and lie!

“Alright, where are others?”

Tim again asks.

“Mother and Kyle decided to do a girls’ night, after father and Grayson decided to order Snickers, taking Brown and Cassandra with them. They’ve been screaming profanities ever since.”

(Mostly Dick tho, each time Bruce screamed Damian flinched, he stopped after the second time. Has now been staring and burning holes at Dick.)

“That explains the three trucks of Snickers outside the manor-”

“FUCK YOU!”

Dick screams again, somehow Snickers not getting stuck in his throat.

“I saw Ra’s banging his head in the hallway, what’s up with that?”

“He might go bankrupt in the future.”

“Ah.”

Tim nods as if understanding. 

“Well, less creepy and more miserable Ra’s is always nice to have for a change, you know?”

_ Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you- _

“Tt, can’t relate. Why are you here?”

“House was weirdly silent, thought to see where everyone is. How long have you been here?”

“FUCK YOU, BRUCE!!!”

“Since 4.”

Tim nods again. 

“You haven’t left them since? You don’t need to worry about them.”

“Are you sure, it’s safe to leave them alone?”

“They’ve been doing this since 1988, they have yet to die.”

Damian turns his eyes away from the competition? Anger management? And finally looks at Tim.

Tim has a plastic bag.

“Why are you really here?”

Right now Dick is eating his 156th Snickers, somehow Bruce is still one Snickers ahead of him. How? no, not how, screw questions, he’s in it to make a statement.

Tim shrugs.

“Want to hang out? We can play Mario Party?”

“You just came here for the Snickers.”

Damian blatantly states.

“And to hang out with you, I mean, if you want? I invited Jay and Duke, they promised to bring pizza.”

“Vegetarian?”

“Vegetarian.”

“Okay.”

As Dick glares intently at Bruce’s eyes, which are sadly covered with a cowl. Dick swears he hates this cowl.

There’s some rustling as they take the non-eaten Snickers. There’s some rustling as they make their way to the door. The door opens and closes. They’re alone now. Still glaring.

Bruce’s mouth twitches. It’s time. It starts as a deep growl.

And now they’re both screaming at the top of their lungs, non-stop:

**“FUCK YOU, DC! FUCK YOU, DC! FUCK YOU DC! FUCK YOU, DC! FUCK YOU, DC! FUCK YOU -”**

The door opens again, with force this time.

“The fuck!?”

It’s Jason, with the pizzas.

Bruce and Dick still haven’t stopped glaring at each other, however, they did stop screaming.

“What’s going on?”

Duke asks in bewilderment.

Dick only smiles. It’s only the beginning. Fuck DC for making them a tragedy, not even a good tragedy!

3

.

They deserve to be happy! Let Bruce grow up, goddamnit! We don’t need any more tragedies and abuse!

.

2

.

‘Fuck DC’

Is the only thing that both Dick and Bruce have in mind. An agreement.

.

1.

.

A smile and they’re both screaming. A protest.

**Author's Note:**

> Opinions & criticisms are welcome.
> 
> This is what would happen if batfam had 4th wall powers.


End file.
